The Girl that has Everything

To kill time in quarantine period, I was watching the videos of Holi party organised by the daughter of India’s richest person Mr. Mukesh Ambani. What a marvellous party it was! Flooded with elite industrialists, bollywood starts and political personalities, Isha Piramal Ambani’s party was not less than a heaven on earth. Deep into my thoughts, I started dreaming of such a wonderful future. Would that I won a lottery! Would that I earned alot in the share market! Would that I could find a treasure some day! Would that I be able to throw a party better than this! Simultaneously I was sad over the pity state of mine. I don’t have my own house. I left my settled career and struggling once again. One more time in my life, I can feel myself at the same stage where I was 10 years back. My inner conscious was pinching me and reminding me of all the things that I don’t have or I couldn’t achieve till date.  This pain was even more aggravating when I saw others marching ahead in life. May be I felt jealous. May be its human nature.   My negativity was increasing the hollowness of my existence. Then I received the message from my friend. She said, “Dear I think you achieved everything that you wanted to have.”  For a moment, I thought, she was kidding with me. The next moment, I had a flashback of all the blessings showered by God. The list was so long that I forgot what I was mourning for! A Great family, Good education, satisfactory job, real friends, wonderful husband, lovable relatives and sound health. I realized, at present, I am the girl that has everything. Sometimes we become so much future driven and fascinated by the worldly pleasures that we totally forget what real happiness means. Remember, you cannot measure your success with someone else’s scale. What others are doing is none of your business. Life will become wonderful if we start looking at the blessings which we have but others are craving for. There may be many people who have earned a lot in their life but they might not have enjoyed the match of carom board and chess with their children. There may be many people who would be leading a luxurious life but they might not have enjoyed the fun of watching television with family. There may be many people having lots of servants at their service but they might be crying for the gossips with real friends. There may be many people who travel in high profile cars but they might not have enjoyed a morning walk with near and dear ones. Am sure, you all must be thinking of all those wonderful memories which are the real asset of your life.

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Crazy Woman

Six Feet of Land

As a child, I was always curious to grow big. Because I was always thinking that mom and dad were living a wonderful life. No school, No homework. How free they are?  My house was near to Girls College. Whenever I saw the girls, I always wanted to dress up like them. Wearing uniform was so boring. Hundreds of aspirations and dreams used to fantasize my mind. When I entered college, I used to look at the successful entrepreneurs and people earning well on jobs. Then I started dreaming of a reputable job with good money. The time came when I completed my college and finally got the job. I was like, now I would be very happy. But I was wrong. That was not the end rather beginning of the journey. I was entered into the race of money making. I got to know that success is measured by the bank balance you have. The more property, the more gold, the more money you acquire, the more respect and value you will earn. I still remember when someone made fun of me when I told her about my salary. It was the initial period of my career and my earning was really meagre. As soon as you step into this race, People start comparing. Trust me, comparisons are like a lice that sucks your blood. That day I learned that you do not have any personal value. That’s why people are mad after making huge properties. Alas! There is no end to this greed. Hang on! I remember the story of the greedy farmer. Who always asked god why he is not the number one farmer. One day a devil heard his story and gave him an option. The devil asked him to take a round of the land as much as he can. The land he would cover by foot would be given to him. But the only condition was that he had to return to the starting point before the sunset. The farmer became very happy. He started running very fast so that he could own a huge piece of land. After some time he was very tired. But he didn’t stop. He kept walking. When there was very less time in sunset, he thought to go back to the starting point. By now, he was dead tired. He could barely breathe. You would be surprised to know that he died when he reached the starting point. What do you learn out of this story? How much land does a man need? The farmer was buried into six feet of land. You don’t even need that if your body is to be burnt as per your religion. Then why are we letting down others for the worldly pleasures? Isn’t it better if we become the support system for each other? Isn’t it better if we value a human’s feelings and emotions more than the bank balance? Isn’t it better if we give more importance to peace of mind and satisfaction rather than properties and precious stones?

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Crazy Woman

Thank God! I am born with silver spoon.

Thank God! I am born with silver spoon. You know what does a silver spoon means for a girl. This is not being rich, this means born in the family where at least your parents take care of your needs, feelings and rights. Alas! This silver spoon is sometimes not being enjoyed by the women in so called elite families. No wonder, you must be confused now. Ok. Let me clarify it. Once I heard a girl who was leader of some union talking about equal rights. The definition of equality was defined in terms of roaming on roads late at night because boys can do so. Oops! She also encouraged the girls to fight against the hostel authorities to demolish all the restrictions to come late. Not only this, some people also define equality by stating that they have given same facilities to girls  as they have given to boys in the family. But I ask you, if boys embarrass girls and tease them; do you also want to tease the boys?  Is this what is called equality? In my opinion, girls do not need anything equal to men. Both male and female are human beings. Why our so called society cannot understand that a female is also a human like the male counterpart. Right to education, Right to be self dependant, Right to take own decisions, right to follow social and cultural practices, Right for social protection are human rights. Then why it is being considered as a favour. This is not something which is reserved for the boys and providing these to girls would be a special opportunity. How ridiculous our social system is!  Hey Girls! Wake Up.  You do not need the right to commit crime because boys do so. You do not need to tease the boys because they tease girls. You do not need to roam unnecessarily on the roads if boys are allowed to do so. The only thing that we need is the appropriate attitude of the society and an improved social system. I seriously wait for the day when people would not debate on the issues of women empowerment, female foeticide, girl education and so on. Because that will be marked as an end of the dark era which is full of discrimination. To bring this change, first of all girls need to understand their own value. I seriously suggest all the girls reading this article, plz stop thinking that giving birth to a male child is gonna increase your importance in family. Plz Stop thinking  that a high profile marriage with a lot of dowry will help u to have a better life style. Plz stop thinking that marrying a rich guy will determine your success. Plz stop thinking that fair complexion will add your value.

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Crazy Woman

The world has changed

When I look back in my life, I always realize that the world has changed a lot. Whether it is technology, social media, value system etc. etc. Film makers have changed their perspective from romantic and action movies to serious concerns of the society. Happiness is measured with bank balance and high profile status. Education is no more considered as a source of enlightenment, it is merely a degree to get a job. Instead of supporting others, everyone is in the race of leg pulling. Above all, the attitude, thinking and family norms have been changed. Amongst these changes, something good has happened. People are now more open about women issues and problems. Gone are the days, when parents used to leave the rooms and change the TV channels during the Stayfree and condom advertisements and kissing scenes. In Canada, when I see the mothers being very happy to see the little ones kissing their boyfriends and girlfriends, I use to imagine if I would have done the same in my time, my parents must have disowned me. I remember, one day with utmost courage I asked my mom, “What this stayfree is all about?” She gave me some briefs about the menstruation cycle. Next day I asked one of my friends, do you know what these sanitary advertisements are all about? She said, yes, it’s to clean the wet floor? My eyes were wide open and I was just thinking who was kidding with me? My mom or my friend. To discuss such topics was also a taboo in our so called civil society. There was a time when the girls were asked to keep quiet if they were molested by someone. Thanks to the “Me Too” movement that empowered the women to seek justice. Many people are talking about equality.  But a question is always raised in my mind. Girls, do you really need to be treated equal as Boys? I don’t think so. You know why……………………………………………………….

Based on the last line, guess what would be the title of my next blog?

Crazy Woman

Crazy Woman’s Fantasyland

Crazy Woman’s Fantasyland

Childhood memories are full of imagination and fantasies. One day a classmate told me that she has some precious gems and diamonds with her. If we sell them then we can get rich overnight. I got curious to see the precious stones. But the condition was, I had to go to her place to have the look. And I already told you in my previous blog that there were a lot of restrictions on the girls in our family. We were not allowed to visit our friends’ house. After a lot of debate in my mind, my curiosity overpowered the norms of the family and I went with her without informing my parents. My family was very worried when I didn’t return from school on time and my mother informed the school teacher and some of my friends gave the information that I have gone with a friend. Worst part of the incident was, there were no diamonds and gems. My friend made me April Fool. She and her sisters made fun of me. Fully disappointed when I reached home, I hide myself under the bed because I knew that its time for my thrashing.  I tried to convince everyone that she dragged me to her house though I was not willing to go but all in vain. I had to bear the brunt. In the fairytale world of a child, his or her birthday is the most special day of life. Like other children, I also wanted my birthday to be celebrated with my friends at home.  I was in forth standard. My little sister was born that year. I was so excited to introduce the baby to my friends. Once again without discussing with my family, I invited my friends to my birthday party. When I reached home, one of my dad’s sister was there with her kids. I totally forgot about the invitation and started playing with my cousins. When the clock stroked 4 p.m., the doorbell rang. Oh! My God, My face turned pale to see my classmates with gifts in their hands. My mom frowned at me while my aunt convinced everyone to celebrate now. On the spot my mother arranged the eatable and balloons but you can well imagine the insult which I had to bear after the party. To make me realize my mistake, my mother used to tell this incident to everyone whoever was visiting our house. I can never forget that birthday. Don’t forget to share in the comment section if any such incident ever happened in your life.

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Crazy woman

Talks of 90’s Children

Being a ninety’s child, how many of you have wished for sanju’s pencil of Shakaa Laka Boom Boom, how many of you have tried to spin like Shaktiman and how many girls have tried to dress up like Sonpari. Being a crazy woman I always wished to have some superpower some day so that I could solve all the problems of the world. Anyways that’s my story. Let me know about your crazy story in the comment section. Mine was the joint family. We were 7 children at home and our mothers used to be very busy with the household work. So I and my cousin used to have boy cut so that it’s easy to get us ready for the school. Ah, I remember the first day of school when one of my teachers made me sit with the boys. As I was having boy cut. So she could not understand my gender. While I was crying to sit with the girls, she was constantly frowning at me. She asked me to keep quiet in a strict voice and I also started playing with boys after some time. In small cities and towns, it was not very common that girls have such short hair. It was only when my mother met the teacher and told her that I am a girl, she could understand my situation. But I was more comfortable sitting with boys now.  You would burst into laughter after reading this. One day a friend of mine told me that your ears would be swollen if you continue to sit with boys and I got frightened. She also told me that all the classmates are our brothers and I tend to believe her. Thank god! My husband was not my classmate in school. I could imagine the poor state of   my dear hubby if the same classmate might have studied with me in the college. Those silly talks make me laugh even today when my memory has flashbacks from my childhood. I clearly recall the day when we had our first telephone connection at home. Earlier we used to go to the neighbors for urgent phone calls. All the seven children were roaming around the phone as we were having the competition as who will pick the phone first. As soon as the bell rang, we all started running to pick the receiver totally unknowing that our grandfather was standing right beside us with a stick in his hand. Thank God, I was physically weakest child of the family. So I was spared. Rest all received their award. After spending a lot of time in village, my family was migrated to city. Due to the little backward nature of the family, girls were not allowed to visit their friend’s houses. I still got Goosebumps while writing the incident when one of my friend………………

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Crazy Woman

Being Eldest is not everybody’s cup of tea

I very well remember the day when I and my brothers were having fight over a petty issue and dad intervened to resolve it. At the end, he said my younger siblings are gonna follow my footprints so I should behave in a certain manner. Oh really dad! My crazy mind was thinking of some mischief that I was doing in my mind and those  little one’s are copying me. Though I pretended as if I understood everything. I already told you, being eldest is not everybody’s cup of tea. After hearing the lecture from dad, I turned out to be very patriotic. Do you remember the Kargil conflict between India and Pakistan in 1999? There were various types of NEWS going on and some were self made by the children in my class. After listening to all the false stories, I was teaching my brothers how we can fight with Pakistani army when they are gonna attack us and how we will be saving our family. Ah! Poor boys. They didn’t even understand what a war mean but they liked my stupid talks and were actively participating in the imaginative war that we were having with Pakistani army at our residence. Not only this, one night I told them the story of ghosts and scared them. You know the brain of the child is like a clean slate. They become whatever you write on it. But we are ninety’s kids. It was an era when technology was not developed at such a high level. Having a Cable TV at home was a matter of prestige. Being average family children, we were deprived of our right to watch cable TV serials as we were supposed to study all the time and bring laurels to the family. But you know, the girl who stood first in the class was having cable connection at home and I stood second. But who will bell the cat and tell my parents that there is no connection between cable TV and education. If you are a child born in ninety’s, then you must be thinking of…………………………………………………

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Crazy Woman

Being Crazy

Being crazy is not being insane, it’s being ambitious. Most of the modern women dream high about their career and life. Our very dynamic and so called contemporary society has given wings to the girls to think high but with the predefined boundaries. As soon as a girl turns twenty, she is supposed to learn the ethics and rules of the society to wear dresses, to correct her gestures and postures. I still remember the guy who once said, girls do not look good when they laugh out loud. But why? What’s the logic behind?  Such a hypocrite world we are living in! They have problem even if a girl laugh. Why should I limit myself with a cute little smile on the face while I want to take out all the fun and laughter inside me? That’s why I feel myself being crazy sometimes when I dare to break these shallow boundaries. This is just the trailer. There is lot more to discuss. Let’s talk about the irritating aunties. Sorry aunties, Please don’t mind. But yes, it’s true when you’re over concerned you’re irritating. I could never understand why aunties want the girls to look perfect all the time so that they can impress a rich and good looking guy. On the top of it, girls with fair complexion can easily hit the bull’s eye. Oh! My god. Those “Fair and Lovely” advertisements were so much on my mind that I got angry with my mother when she refused to buy one for me. She said that I am already fair enough. But you know when my cousin did the rating of fairness of all the girls in the family, I topped at the bottom. I could not sleep the whole night and next day I made turmeric paste and start rubbing on my face as a substitute to fair and lovely. Then my crazy thinking triggered me. Why is it important to look good? “To impress a guy”…. an aunty’s voice echoed in my mind. My brain replied, “stop doing this you fool. You are not born to impress someone.” I went back to my room and started studying. You know this colour discrimination is very old and deep rooted in Indian society. My mother once told me the story of the boy who rejected the girl after seeing her younger sister who was more beautiful. I can never forget the dialogue of my sister at that moment, who is seven years younger to me. She said, “mom, when someone will come to see didi, please hide me somewhere, otherwise he will select me over her.” Though she was in third standard at that time but I was mad at her. How dare that little monster consider herself more pretty than me! But I could not say anything to her as she always gain sympathy for being the tiny one. You know, it’s not easy to be the eldest child in the family especially when you are trying to be very idealistic, obedient and hard working who wants to earn praise from every nook and corner. I hope all the eldest children would be well connected with this situation. I very well remember the day………………..

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Crazy Woman

Introduce Yourself (Example Post)

This is an example post, originally published as part of Blogging University. Enroll in one of our ten programs, and start your blog right.

You’re going to publish a post today. Don’t worry about how your blog looks. Don’t worry if you haven’t given it a name yet, or you’re feeling overwhelmed. Just click the “New Post” button, and tell us why you’re here.

Why do this?

  • Because it gives new readers context. What are you about? Why should they read your blog?
  • Because it will help you focus your own ideas about your blog and what you’d like to do with it.

The post can be short or long, a personal intro to your life or a bloggy mission statement, a manifesto for the future or a simple outline of your the types of things you hope to publish.

To help you get started, here are a few questions:

  • Why are you blogging publicly, rather than keeping a personal journal?
  • What topics do you think you’ll write about?
  • Who would you love to connect with via your blog?
  • If you blog successfully throughout the next year, what would you hope to have accomplished?

You’re not locked into any of this; one of the wonderful things about blogs is how they constantly evolve as we learn, grow, and interact with one another — but it’s good to know where and why you started, and articulating your goals may just give you a few other post ideas.

Can’t think how to get started? Just write the first thing that pops into your head. Anne Lamott, author of a book on writing we love, says that you need to give yourself permission to write a “crappy first draft”. Anne makes a great point — just start writing, and worry about editing it later.

When you’re ready to publish, give your post three to five tags that describe your blog’s focus — writing, photography, fiction, parenting, food, cars, movies, sports, whatever. These tags will help others who care about your topics find you in the Reader. Make sure one of the tags is “zerotohero,” so other new bloggers can find you, too.

Introduce Yourself (Example Post)

This is an example post, originally published as part of Blogging University. Enroll in one of our ten programs, and start your blog right.

You’re going to publish a post today. Don’t worry about how your blog looks. Don’t worry if you haven’t given it a name yet, or you’re feeling overwhelmed. Just click the “New Post” button, and tell us why you’re here.

Why do this?

  • Because it gives new readers context. What are you about? Why should they read your blog?
  • Because it will help you focus your own ideas about your blog and what you’d like to do with it.

The post can be short or long, a personal intro to your life or a bloggy mission statement, a manifesto for the future or a simple outline of your the types of things you hope to publish.

To help you get started, here are a few questions:

  • Why are you blogging publicly, rather than keeping a personal journal?
  • What topics do you think you’ll write about?
  • Who would you love to connect with via your blog?
  • If you blog successfully throughout the next year, what would you hope to have accomplished?

You’re not locked into any of this; one of the wonderful things about blogs is how they constantly evolve as we learn, grow, and interact with one another — but it’s good to know where and why you started, and articulating your goals may just give you a few other post ideas.

Can’t think how to get started? Just write the first thing that pops into your head. Anne Lamott, author of a book on writing we love, says that you need to give yourself permission to write a “crappy first draft”. Anne makes a great point — just start writing, and worry about editing it later.

When you’re ready to publish, give your post three to five tags that describe your blog’s focus — writing, photography, fiction, parenting, food, cars, movies, sports, whatever. These tags will help others who care about your topics find you in the Reader. Make sure one of the tags is “zerotohero,” so other new bloggers can find you, too.